Friday, May 24, 2013

Why I hate dogs

I hate dogs.

I like to bike and many times when I bike pass some house, there will be a dog barking fiercely at me, sometimes even chase me, as if I am about to invade their house.

From the intelligence of a human being, I am so unlikely to be an invader, by just biking past a house. But for the intelligence of a dog, what do you expect? Perhaps, I should not hate them, but I am annoyed.

Some politicians like to call this country a threat and that country a threat when those countries are peacefully minding their own business, just like me. Perhaps, even more ridiculous, a dog won't even bark at an ant walking past its house.

paranoid, or?

Monday, May 13, 2013

No pressure, my friend

I like to be pressure-free. Neither do I like to pressure myself, nor do I like to get pressure from others.

Friends. I have always believed in the Chinese saying that the friendship between noble people should be as bland as water 君子之交淡如水。It means that when we make friends, we should not expect anything from friends, and we should not make friends feel pressured to do anything because of us.  I am always hesitant to ask favors from friends, especially close friends---being close friends, I fear they will tend to feel the pressure to agree, and that makes me feel upset. I really hope one day people around me, will always tell me honestly, whenever they feel inconvenient to do something I asked for.

People now like to show "support" for friends. For me, I think it is quite unnecessary. We are friends because we share similar interests, but we do not have identical interests. When I am doing something I am interested in but you are not, why should you feel obliged to show support? Friendship, I feel, should be based on common interests and goals, not on reciprocity. One of my friends told me after my thesis defense that when he arrived, he knew he would not understand anything, and said those things are about friendship. I replied that is exactly the reason why I was reluctant to tell him the time and place of my defense. I feel guilty for creating pressure on you, my friend.  I showed up to your history thesis defense not because you are my friend, but because I am genuinely intrigued by your paper.

Friendship should be simple. No burden. Simple joy.


Friday, May 3, 2013

Why I gave up martial art

I used to be a student of martial art, a fervent one. During my worst days, that was my only companion--it was only during those hours when I practice martial art that I could focus and not distracted by painful thoughts. I seriously thought I would take it as a life-long pursuit.

But I gave it up in college. Williams is not to be blamed. It is true we do not have such a professional martial art club, but I gave it up more because I wanted to.

My first encounter with Martial Art is Tai Chi, an ancient form of Chinese martial art.  The first day we did not learn forms, but about the philosophies. I remember very clearly what the master said: " The purpose of martial art is not violence, but is to stop violence. We learnt that our biggest enemy is never others people, but ourselves, our inner urge toward violence and brutality, and to master martial art, we need to master the art to curb such aggression. (克己) This is not an idealistic romantic tenet of some ancient Chinese philosophers, but a very wise idea---you can be very strong, as strong as you can, but if you cannot curb your urge to violence and aggression, soon it will backfire when you upset enough people and/or strong enough people. We will turn old and weak, and none of us can stay on the top, aggression and violence will turn back toward us if we do not curb them in the first place. Respect (礼)and benevolence (任)are always stressed. As these guide the previous principle, which literally means hold back yourself from you should not do. Even in Japan, the tenet of Bushido includes respect and benevolence, but they over-stressed loyalty and honor, and when being loyal to the wrong thing, and taking honor in the wrong thing, things get bad. What happened in WWII is only a sick and disgusting deviation from the true spirit, not the orthodox martial art philosophy. In the movie Yip Man, Yip Man said rightly: " You Japanese invaders are unworthy of martial art".

That is all good and beautiful. Later I realized however, mastering martial art will not help stop violence. In this age, violence never takes the form of bare-fist fight between individuals, but are staged by countries, organizations, and using deadly weapons that easily out-power the most skillful martial artist. In the movie Yip Man, Yip Man felt the same futility when he saw Japanese invaders did horrible things, and killed people but he could do nothing though he is the best martial artist of the time. What is more, I realized I began to develop knee problems from martial art practice. The purpose of martial art is to protect others from violence, and not only is that impossible, but also, instead of protecting ourselves, we are hurting ourselves. That was the last straw.

In this world, when the media continuously distort the truth, we do not even know what is right and what is wrong, then what is the use of power?